yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize