Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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