i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
That reminds me...we need to get swords
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
