Whoa Z and x make the same sound
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize