Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
