Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
