kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
