North Korea, Best Korea!
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
