And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
