But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
wat bout pragnant strippers??
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
