Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
