I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
