my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
