Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize
