I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
