i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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