I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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