I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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