i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize