I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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