I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
