my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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