so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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