I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
