I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
