Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
pray to the hookup gods
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
