so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
