Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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