is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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