Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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