is wine microwaveable?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
