Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
