Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
