Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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