time to smoke my breakfast
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
