they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I need moral support for this bender
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
