This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
please come you make the beer taste better
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
