I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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