I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize