So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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