You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
