If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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