How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
