walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
