Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
honey bunches of taint.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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