Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
he shaved USA in his pubs
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize