Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
