Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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