i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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