Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
